Thursday, January 23, 2014

Cecilia's Placement

Placement Day.  Always a bittersweet day.  There is so much love, and so much heartbreak.

Before coming to the hospital, we did a lot of last minute things.  Like, I sewed the button on a pair of Greg's pants that have been sitting on my dresser for at least two weeks.  And Ellie "drove" her car while I was washing the sheets.

Greg's sister Tammy came over about 12:15 to play with the girls, and we left for the hospital.  We got there about 10 minutes early, and had the chance to talk in the lobby.  So many emotions, sitting and waiting.  Excitement and anticipation, and also worrying about how {R} was feeling, and anticipating the sadness ahead.  I had Greg read my last post on Tender Mercies, with the research on feelings before and after placement.  We really feel it is a blessing that we have not experienced the "typical" reactions of adoptive families after placement.  I think it comes from feeling like we do not "own" our children, but that we are stewards for choice spirits of our Heavenly Father.  And the more people who can love and guide these spirits while they are on earth, the better!

We met with {R}s case worker and our case worker and visited for a few minutes before heading upstairs.  {R}s Bishop and Relief Society President were there, and it was nice to meet them.  {R} requested that her Bishop give her a blessing, and asked Greg to assist.  Then she asked Greg to give Cece a blessing.  What a wonderful experience!  The Spirit was so strong.  That hospital room is truly a sacred place.

Then our group left and it was time to sign paperwork and for {R} and her family to take as much time as they wanted to soak in Cece.  When they were ready, we headed back in to visit some more, exchange presents, and take some pictures.  {R}s case worker had all of us talk about our feelings for {R}, Cece, and adoption.  We were all crying, even Greg.  Truly a special time together.

{R} got Cece the cutest going home outfit.  And a cheetah blanket and a zebra blanket!

{R} wanted us all to walk out together, so after talking with the nurse and going over the discharge paperwork, we loaded Cece in the car seat and headed downstairs.  The final good-byes in the lobby were heartrending.    Definitely "horrible beauty."  It is difficult for me to watch our daughters' birth moms voluntarily break their own hearts because of their dreams for their daughters.  I am truly grateful to {T}, {M}, and {R} for showing me the depths of their love and selflessness.

When we pulled in the garage, the door opened, and Ellie and Lynnie were jumping up and down and dancing.  They were saying things like, "I'm so nervous!  I'm so excited!"  It took us too long to get out of the car, so Ellie put some shoes on and came exploring.

Finally, finally, we were all inside!  Ellie had that car seat cover up before Daddy could move the arm.  She couldn't wait to see Cece up close!

After a few looks, we sent the girls off to wash their hands.  Ellie was holding her hands up for the "sniff test."

3 daughters.
3 Birth Moms.
1 Family.

First bottle at home, and Ellie was super helpful in holding the bottle with me.

Greg's parents & Daniel stayed for a few minutes (they had been playing with the big girls while we were at the hospital--they split the shift with Tammy) and then headed home.  Our next visitors were the Morrows.

Hailey is so excited yo have another 'little sister!'

Ellie very reluctantly let Mom-Julie and Hailey have turns holding Cece.  Then she said, "Silly Brian, I think it should be your turn to hold Cece now. Then it can be my turn again!"

Nice Brian declined his turn so that it could be Ellie's turn again more quickly.

Mom-Julie took this precious picture.

After looking at Cece a little bit, Lynnie adopted the let's-ignore-the-baby approach and went in the backyard to play.

Hailey went with her and they made snow angels.

This picture pretty much sums up the rest of our night:  Ellie holding Cece and Lynnie being a cautious observer.

My mom came for a few hours and helped get the big girls in bed.  The BCLs also brought dinner and some gifts.  What a great day!


Carrie said...

Love the story! Still praying for {R} and her family. On another note, we have the same "bassinet" that has a slight incline. I have a love-hate relationship with it that i'd like to share before it's too late for you.. My baby LOVES the incline and how she feels snuggled by the bassinet. She is now 5 months old and still flat out refuses to sleep anywhere else. The problem : she has outgrown the bassinet. It's probably not so safe for her since she is learning to roll over. We're going to have some loooong nights of lots of crying trying to switch her to the crib. My suggestion: use the regular crib either for night time sleeping or day time naps from the beginning so Cece can get used to both of them!! Don't make the same mistake we did ;)

Sheyann said...

Even reading about placement day makes me nauseated and my heart rate spike. Apparently, I've a little PTSD from our last placement, which was really rough. However, I loved reading your thoughts. So sweet and tender! Love the older girls' reactions. :) Congratulations!


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